Some think of acceptance as giving up. Acceptance is not playing dead. It’s an appreciation for all that you are and have done. You might not be making progress as quickly as you had hoped. But any attempt is note worthy. Action and acceptance can be a parallel process.
I love my purse collection. I am thankful for each and pocketbook, bag and clutch I own. But that doesn’t mean I’m not going buy more! I hope that my future is filled with handbags of all shapes, colors and sizes! I will continue to rock the ones I have, as I shop for more! I know, I know! It’s easier to tolerate a fashion accessory deficit, than the shape of our thighs. But is there any purpose in hating what we have now? No good comes out of focusing on what we don’t have, didn’t do or what we dislike.
If you feel like you are in a self loathing rut, there are ways out. Try focusing on aspects of your life you love and appreciate. Start and end each day with a list of 10 things you are thankful for. You can just do this in your mind as you prepare your morning coffee or when you close your eyes to fall asleep. Your list can start out with shallow materialistic items. It’s ok! We should be filled with gratitude if we have a roof over our head and a cool cell phone. As you get more comfortable with the process, dig a little deeper. Spread the love! Acknowledge respectful relationships, your knowledge in a specific are, the fitness goals you have achieved and whatever else is going well. When we focus on the good stuff we have going on, our behavior tends to follow. We are more likely to engage in healthier behaviors that make us happy when we are in a positive mindset, than when we are judging and criticizing ourselves.
If you need an additional boost in inspiration or perspective, read anything by spiritual leader and author Eckhart Tolle.
“Wherever you are, be there totally. If you find your here and now intolerable and it makes you unhappy, you have three options: remove yourself from the situation, change it, or accept it totally. If you want to take responsibility for your life, you must choose one of those three options, and you must choose now. Then accept the consequences.” Eckhart Tolle