I did a 3 hour training for 17 people last week. I felt like I was in the zone and people seemed receptive. The last couple minutes were quiet, as people filled out their evaluations on me. I immediately started thinking about the stupid things I regretted saying. I do a lot of work shops and the negative thoughts always pop up as soon as it’s over. I know to squash them at least until I read the evals! Turns out, all 17 people checked off excellent on their survey! I usually get one or two goods. There’s typically feedback that says, “more audience participation.” Another one might say, “less group exercises.” I can walk away and know, ya just can’t please everyone. 17 excellent ratings across the board is something to feel good about! And still, all I could think about was what I should of done differently. I would never pick someone else presentation apart, like I do to my own. I know I’m not alone in this process. It’s amazing how our brains go directly to the negative. Over the years I have trained my brain to process events differently because discouraging chatter is not useful. My initial thoughts still head south. But I catch them before they go to far. I can’t always switch it up to a happy go lucky, who gives a shit about what other people think, mindset. But I can stop the pessimistic slant. My first trick is to use a neutral word to repeat in my head. I use the word “release.” Then I take a deep breath and do a reality check. Today, as you step on the scale, open a bill, get stuck in traffic, see where your minds goes. Remember my little mantra…release, release, release.